TPR Hearing: 3rd Time's A Charm: UPDATE

Update:

After finding some incorrect dates on paperwork the judge continued our case until after lunch. At 2:00pm the case was reconvened and at approximately 3:45pm TPR was deemed necessary for the birth mother. HOWEVER, there are some outside circumstances (which I don't feel comfortable discussing here...it's not my story to tell anyway, it's Baby Girl's, should she ever choose) that have caused some other paperwork to not be processed correctly. Therefore, we go back to court for those circumstances on October 28th. Nonetheless, TPRing the birth mother's rights was a HUGE step in the right direction. But, it looks as if my personal goal of Baby Girl being a legal Beaver by Christmas may not be attainable.

Oh well, who cares about my plans anyway? I just need to continue to surrender it to the One who knows all plans, judges all hearts and sees all futures.

Thanks for your prayers today. The were certainly felt. As for our friends The Hauts, check out their blog for an update.


Original Post:

This morning we head back to court for Baby Girl's Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) hearing. If you're new around these parts, let me catch you up to speed. Baby Girl is our 10 month old foster daughter whom we've parented since birth (October 2008).

The judge changed her plan from reunification to TPR back in February. This is the third time we will visit the court room with the hopes that today is the day that TPR is done. We are blessed to share this court date with our good friends the Hauts. They have a foster son (who is 3 days older than our Aaron) whose case is also being heard for a TPR.

So, we are praying that both cases are heard today, that TPR is ruled and that our precious babies will be one step closer to being legally free for adoption.

Won't you offer up just a teentsy, tiny prayer too? Thanks. I'll update later this afternoon to hopefully bring you good news.

In the meantime, enjoy this picture of Ashlee playing Mommy to Baby Girl. Tender, huh?

Good News, Bad News: A Court Update

Baby Girl's Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) hearing was scheduled for this morning.

The good news is that I did not get arrested for contempt of court this morning.

The bad news is that the case was continued until August 20th. I do not feel comfortable sharing why the case was continued, just know that your tax dollars (for those of you living in NC) were wasted today. I am beyond frustrated.

Fostering Update: Adoptions and Court

All three social workers came by this morning (our licensing social worker, Aaron's social worker and Baby Girl's social worker). I found out that Aaron and Baby Girl's cases will be taken to Adoption Committee together on July 28th or 29th. That, of course, is contingent upon Baby Girl's Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) case being heard on July 23rd. If all goes well on the 23rd, her case will be approved for adoption along with Aaron's.

After Aaron's case goes to adoption committee I will meet his social worker at the clerk of court and file all the paperwork needed to legally change his name and make him an official Beaver. Then they hold the paperwork for 10 days (just some rule they have) and file it all after the 10 day mark. Once it is filed, he is legal! Woopie!

Baby Girl's case will not move so swiftly. When and if her case is heard on the 23rd the DSS attorney then has to draft the TPR petition. That petition goes to the judge that heard the case. Once that judge signs the petition Baby Girl's birth mother has 30 days to file an appeal. Now, don't think that drafting the TPR petition and the judge's signature is a quick thing either. I've heard of it taking as little as 6 weeks and as long as 2 years. (Yes, the 2 years was an exception, but it has happened in our county. SO frustrating!)

30 days after the judge has signed the petition, and if birth mother does not appeal, then Baby Girl would be legally free for adoption. All that would be left would be meeting the social worker at the clerk of court once more and then the 10 day waiting period (that is assuming that we were approved for her at adoption committee).

Whew! I inteded for this to be a quick update, but I guess when you have so much red tape, you're dealing with the legal system and when you are referencing adoptions, quick posts are an oxymoron.

Court Today: UPDATED

Update:

Well, clearly God has a sense of humor. Yesterday Baby Girl's social worker called me to fill me in on some information. She told me that she thought today would be a breeze, the birth mom wouldn't show up and that everything was checked and double checked by her and the DSS attorney.

Well....clearly not. I love how we always try to think that we (humans) have it SO under control and then God assertively reminds us that HE is the One who oversees all things.

Today, Baby Girl's case was called, we moved to the front and we waited for about 10 minutes for the judge to read through the history of the case. Just 20 minutes earlier the judge had dismissed Baby Girl's birth mom's attorney because we had thought that his duties had been fulfilled. Turns out, they had not been. SO, all of that to say, her case has been continued until July 23rd. Most likely, our good friends the Hauts will be in court with us on that day as well and I just love that God always places our court hearings on the same day as theirs...what a nifty guy God is (can I call God nifty?).

So although we were surprised by this change in plans, I know that all of this is no surprise to Him. He knew every court date and continuation before Baby Girl was ever conceived. I know that He already knows His plans, and I rest in that knowledge.

Thank you for your prayers today, I certainly felt them as I felt much more peace than I have in the past.

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Original Post:

We head off to court in just a few minutes for Baby Girl's Termination of Parental Rights hearing. We are praying for a swift hearing with no hang ups. If you feel led, please pray with us. I will update when I can this afternoon.

Thanks!

Ongoing

Court was postponed until March 26th (I know I told some of you April 2nd, but apparently I was wrong). We will know more then.

Thanks for the prayers, we certainly felt them this morning. Our friends* who also were in court with us today had the joy of being the FIRST case called (which is such a HUGE blessing). Plus, they also received great news about their foster son's case. Everything was, most certainly, an answer to prayer.

I will update you all next week when I know more details.

*If you'd like to read more about our friends' adoption journey, check out this post to get access to her restricted blog.

Called Out

Thanks for the encouraging words and prayers you all have said on our behalf. I am so humbled. I confessed to my friend this morning that my heart hadn't really changed that much. Then, she asked me a question that took me back. She said,

"When this is all over and he's safely adopted, do you think you'll be able to pray for his parents then?"

She meant it with kindness and sincerity, but the truth is, she pointed out the ugliness that is gripping my heart over these people.

As I thought about her comment the rest of morning, I realized that she basically called me out. She made me realize that I'm being stupid and selfish and just mean. And although I can't say that I will approach Baby D's birth parents with love and kindness, I can say that I am now praying over them.

I am praying that they will find the goodness of the Savior. Right now, that's just about all I can pray.

Tomorrow, court starts at 9:30. From now until then, I will be a walking prayer. Praying to be at least willing to be made willing. Praying for peace. Praying for the ugly to find another home far far way from my heart.

My Totally Ticked Off Heart

On Monday we head back to court for Baby D. I cannot describe to you how ready I am to be there. Normally, court dates make me a nervous wreck. In fact, I usually dread court so much that I have trouble sleeping the few days beforehand. This time will be different. Although I'm sure my nerves will be a hoppin' on the drive there, I feel so confident about Monday's hearing.

Let me show you why. Here is Baby D's birth parents visitation record since February 1st, 2009. They are suppose to have one 2 hour visit a week. (It used to be two 2 hour visits a week, but since they canceled the majority of visits in January, DSS dropped them down to one visit a week. Clearly they were not phased.)

Feb 6th - had a visit. The Baby D's social worker "dropped" in (they are supervised by a different social worker, who is there the entire time) and found out that the birth parents had gotten 2 pet rabbits. Said rabbits were ON THE FLOOR LOOSE with my baby. They were given a voucher for a drug screening, but they never took the tests.

Feb 13th - canceled the visit because birth dad was sick
Feb 20th - canceled the visit because birth dad sick
Feb 27th - canceled the visit because birth mom was sick
March 6th - canceled the visit to "run errands"
March 13th - canceled the visit because of an "appointment"

In January, they saw him twice. They canceled all of the other visits because of sickness as well.

Also, neither of the birth parents have done ANYTHING in their case plan since November.

Before I begin my rant: Our good friends The Hauts will be in court with us on Monday for their case with their foster son who is 3 days older than Baby D. If you're in the prayin' mood, offer one up for them as well. If you just clicked on that link and realized that their blog is private, check out this post as to how you can get access. It's worth the effort, I promise.

So you see, I'm not all that stressed about court on Monday. Clearly, any judge that would NOT begin terminating their rights should be de-robed (Is that what you do? Maybe de-benched? Oh, you know what I mean.) I am doubting that the birth parents will even show up for court. However, it's the what if they show up that haunts me.

I just don't know how to interact with these people. I don't know how to stand there and pretend that I'm not completely ticked at them. I don't know how to love them. I don't want to know how to love them. They have NO CLUE that their son is crawling. They don't know how precious his new 2 toothed grin is because they have no clue that he even has two teeth. They've never spent a night holding him, rocking him and comforting him because he was sick or teething.

On top of all of those emotions, I am also ticked that they had the audacity to claim him on their taxes. Oh yeah...I'm not kidding. Luke and I have had to mail in a hard copy of our tax return WITH an appeal letter because these people thought it was a good idea to claim the child that they do not have in their home nor are they making efforts towards regainig.

Is it wrong of me to pray that they go to jail for tax fraud? It is? Crap, that's what I thought.

Basically, I know that I'm suppose to be all "love them like Jesus would love them" but the truth is, I don't wanna. I want them to suffer. I want them to hurt. I want them to understand just how much pain they will one day cause my son when he has to face the truth of their neglect. I don't want to pray for God to give me the ability to love them. I don't want to see their faces at all.

In fact, if I never see them again I'm okay.

But the truth is, I know that I'm not any better than they are. When I yelled at Ashlee today because she was taking so friggin' long to put on her pants, I sinned.

When I lost it with Baby Girl tonight because she would-not-stop-crying, I sinned.

When I allowed inappropriate words to dance through my head and then I uttered them under my breath, I sinned.

When I got ticked at Luke for no good reason then I allowed myself to stay ticked, I sinned.

I'm as hopeless as they are. I too deserve the hurt, the pain. I deserve to suffer.

I wish I could type out some eloquent prayer about how I want my heart to be transformed, but if I did I would be a hypocrite. I cannot sit here and pretend that I want my heart to change toward them because I don't. I cannot sit here and pray a prayer that is not real. I can't fake it and I won't. Although my mind knows that this is so, so selfish my heart isn't on board. My heart wants retaliation. My heart wants justice.

So this weekend, I will choose to busy myself with all things aside from prayerful mediation. I will choose to clean my house, wash dishes, wipe stinky butts and comfort crying kids. I will hang out with friends, laugh at my children and cuddle with my husband. My mind knows that I should be prayerfully anticipating Monday, but my heart refuses to follow. So, if you think of it and you feel led, pray for this heart of mine. It's full of anger and hurt and just a nastiness that I cannot shake. And while these feelings themselves are not entirely sinful, the refusal to lay them aside and ask my Lord for help...well, that is.

So there it is, my real emotion. The raw me. My real "totally ticked" heart is asking you NOT to pray for it. It's stupid and wrong and totally sinful but I mean really, you didn't think I was perfect anyway, now did you?

Today In Court

Well, we sat in court today until just before 1:00pm. We heard a lot of heartbreaking cases, none of which had to do with the children in our home. At just before 1:00pm, the judge continued the case until February 9th.

It was continued because the birth dad listed on the DSS paperwork has been located and the judge ordered paternity testing.

We did see both birth mom and (potential) birth dad in court today. It was nerve wracking, sitting there in court, wanting to stare at Baby Girl's birth mom, but also not wanting to make her uncomfortable, or elicit a dirty look. I doubt that she knew that we were Baby Girl's foster parents because we didn't speak and since the case never technically came before the court, we never stepped forward.

Knowing that it will be Baby Girl's 4 month birthday before her case is even brought before the judge is discouraging. Knowing that it is all in God's hands is peaceful.

I did give the letter and photo to the social worker so that she could pass it along to Baby Girl's birth mother. Please pray with me that she receives it for what it is, and that her heart is softened so that she might be receptive to the love that the Lord already has for her.

Thanks for the prayers, comments, text messages and support that you have shown me and Luke. We cherish every one and know that it is not by our own strength that we made it through today.

Court Anyone?

Just a reminder that tomorrow, we go back to court for Baby Girl's Disposition. DSS is recommending Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) and Adoption. However, I found out on Thursday that the judge that is on the bench is the same judge I posted about here. She is none-to-fond of DSS and often sides with birth parents to a fault.

Above all, Luke and I know that God is in control of tomorrow's proceedings. If you feel led, please pray that all goes smoothly and that Luke and I feel at peace with finally seeing Baby Girl's birth mom. However, most importantly, please pray that Baby Girl's birth mother will be receptive to the love of Jesus Christ and the letter that I wrote her. Maybe she's never heard of Him, or maybe she has but she doesn't think He can do anything for her. At the very least, I pray that her heart is receptive to the redeption that only He can offer.

Thanks for journeying this with us.

Baby D's Court Hearing Today

The judge ruled to continue Baby D's case plan as reunification with the birth parents. Needless to say, I'm very frustrated and even a little ticked.

Thanks for the prayers and encouragement.

Another Day In Court

Tomorrow we go back to court for Baby D's case that got pushed back. We are hoping that the judge will side the the G.A.L. recommendation and begin a concurrent plan that would introduce Termination of Parental Rights (TPR). However, we know that it is in God's hands.

I think what saddens me the most is that Baby D's parents are clearly not willing to give up the things that brought him into the Foster Care system, yet they are also not willing to relinquish their rights. If pressed on your heart, please pray that we would handle tomorrow with grace and mercy and be a light to them while we are in the midst of this remarkable Season of Joy, the birth of our Savior.

I'll update as soon as I can. Blessings.

Baby Girl's Court Update

Today was probably one of the hardest days we've faced so far in this journey. Here is the best way I can describe it to you:

Imagine sitting in a cold, hard room. With you are familiar faces, but no one you know who is a true ally. The person being discussed is someone you love dearly, someone you know you'd give your life for. Someone you have grown to cherish and dream about. Someone you have prayed over, cried over and hurt for. Now, imagine those familiar faces speaking about this person you love. At first, they begin by saying things you already know. Times this person has been hurt. If you're thinking of your child, it would be like them discussing a skinned knee, maybe a broken arm, or a fall that left a nasty bump on their head.

Then, they move on to talk about the person who had inflicted hurt and pain on your loved one. They discuss all the ways that this person has hurt other people. Those ways are the same as the ways that this person has hurt the one you love.

Now, imagine sitting there and being blindsided with information you never knew existed. Imagine them talking about harming your loved one in ways that are similar to torture. Imagine them discussing how your child has been abused, neglected and put in dangerous situations. This is more than skinned knees, bumped heads or broken arms. Now we are talking about REAL danger. Danger that comes with a death sentence. Danger that you know should have killed them. Danger that makes your heart break in half and ache for them in a way you've never known possible.

As I sat there in that court room this morning, listening to the things my precious Baby Girl has already endured in her lifetime, I lost all composure. The tears flowed freely and even now, as I write this, hot tears sting my eyes. During the adjudication, as the investigator spoke of the ways my child has been abused, she would glance up and me, but I saw no pain on her face.

I can only imagine that these people who work daily with abused and neglected children have become hardened. I see how it might shock them to see a woman, struggling to maintain some sort of composure, hurt this badly over a child she did not birth. I managed to only squeek out silent tears within the court room walls, but as soon as Luke and I stepped out of the courthouse, I lost it, we both did. As we stood there, both of us crying, shaking and holding each other, we mourned over the thought of having to tell our sweet Baby Girl all of the things she had to endure before she even drew her first breath.

Today we only had the Adjudication. Birth mom did not come to court. We return to court on January 12th for the Disposition, at which time DSS will recommend to the court Termination of Parental Rights (TPR). While I am thrilled with this decision, my heart remains heavy as I now know more than what is probably digestable.

Thank you for your prayers today. I know that the grace and mercy of the Lord carried us through and will continue to prove Him faithful in all things.

You hem me in- behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
Psalm 139:5-6

Baby Girl's 1st Court Hearing

Today, we go to court for Baby Girl. It's iffy if birth mom will even show and if the case will even be heard. It would be an important court date because it would be the adjudication and disposition (this 2nd link will open a word document) component of Baby Girl's case.

A lot of information is disclosed at these hearings and it will set the course for Baby Girl's ultimate time line of permanent placement, where ever that may be (although I'm sure you all know by now MY desires).

If it comes to mind, please pray over the judge, social workers, birth parents, attorneys and G.A.L.s. Also pray that the case will be heard, as Baby Girl is nearing 3 months old and her "plan" has not even begun to take shape.

I know God is in control, above all else. I'll update you as soon as I can. Thanks.

Court Today

Baby D's case was moved to next Monday, December 22nd. The judge just-so-happens to be married to birth mom's attorney. It was a conflict of interest. It bugs me because birth mom didn't show up in court today because she is tired from working 3rd shift. GRRRRRR!

BUT, that means that a different, less DSS hating judge, will be on the stand next week to hear Baby D's case. I smile because I know that God is in control, regardless of next week's ruling (which could still not be in our favor).

Please continue to pray for our friends, as their little boy's case will (hopefully) be heard today. There is more at stake with him. Luke and I wanted, so badly, to stay and be a support for them. But with it being the holidays and everyone in Luke's office being out, he really needed to go in to work today, especially since he'll still be taking off on Thursday for Baby Girl's case and then again next Monday.

Thanks for all the prayers. You are such a blessing!

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It's Off to Court We Go...

I know the title of this sounds light and airy, but my heart is very heavy with knowing that we will be in court on Monday. The judge on the stand is known for siding with birth parents - almost to a fault. With that in mind, if it is pressed on your heart, please pray for us, Baby D's case, the judge, the social workers, the GAL folks, D's birth parents and everyone involved in court on Monday.

My prayer, obviously, is that the court would begin to terminate the birth parents' rights. However, I know that is JESSICA'S plan and not necessarily God's. Please pray for Luke and I to have peace, an obvious love for our sweet Baby D and to shine the light of our Savior in that drab, dark court room.

Also, some of our good friends will be in court that day as well (already an answer to prayer), for their sweet boy Daniel (who just-so-happens to be 3 days older than Baby D). I'm sure they'd appreciate a prayer or two as well.

I'll let you know how it went sometime Monday. Blessings!

Baby Updates and Upcoming Court

Well, DSS finally got smart and decided to wait and see if Baby Girl's birth mom shows up before they come to get her. So, this morning, at 9am there was a scheduled visit. At 9:20am the social worker called and said that birth mom was not there and that until they heard further, it would be a weekly thing to wait and see. I appreciate them saving my tax-payer dollars and not driving all over Egypt un-neccesarily.

Next week is a big week for us. On Monday, we go to court for Baby D. Since he's 6 months old, the G.A.L. has recommended to the court a concurrent plan of reunification and termination of parental rights (TPR). Now, that does not mean that is what will happen, it is purely her recommendation. DSS is still recommending reunification. Baby D's parents have not passed a drug screening and it is my understanding that they have all but stopped attending their drug treatment classes. Also, the judge on the bench is very pro-birth parents. My understanding is that she almost favors them to a fault. NOT good if we want to begin the TPR paperwork and try to have the concurrent plan passed. However, we will have good friends in court with us that day, and I think it will provide some much needed peace.

Then, Baby Girl is scheduled for court next Thursday. However, her social worker told me that they have not yet determined paternity so her case may not be heard. I don't know how much longer before they move past the fact that her father cannot be located and determined and they just proceed. It's all so very frustrating.

Baby D is doing so well and is such a happy boy! (As I type this, he is "making" me a party favor.) He just laughs and talks and his favorite thing is the Johnny Jump Up. He adores it and will sit in it for nearly an hour jumping and talking and squealing.

Baby Girl is growing and getting so much more alert. I don't remember any of the other 4 kids being this alert at 2 months old. She is cooing and smiling and she will turn her head and follow me with her eyes when I walk across the room. She's so precious and cuddly and (except for today) is such an easy baby.

I know I haven't blogged much about how much I adore and love her, but it is not because of the lack of emotion. Trust me, I'm completely in love with her. But like I told my BFF last night, I just don't think I can allow myself to be consumed with her case like I was Baby D's. Seriously, when we got him it was all I thought and prayed about (notice the abundance of posts about him from the beginning).

This time, I'm trying so hard to let go and just let God be in control. So, I plan on spending an entire post on her and my love for her, but right now I can't let myself be that emotional. I'm afraid if the flood gates open, they will not shut easily and flooding isn't something extra I need in my house right now. I've got lots of kids to take care of, and during the day, I'm the only one here who knows how to swim.

Court Update

Today wasn't so bad. We were done by lunchtime, which I'm told is rare. Basically, the judge gave the birth parents 3 more months to get their act together. We go back to court on December 15th. Guess we'll see what unfolds between now and then. Right now, I have peace.

I must say, though, I really liked the judge today. The last time we went to court, the judge hardly paid attention. Today's judge, The Honorable Carlton Terry (if you live near here and vote) was great! He was into each case being heard and even ruled for termination of parental rights in two of the cases we saw. Both were warranted cases where the birth parents had been given plenty of time to get their acts together and had failed, miserably. At one point, he told a birth mom that they were moving toward termination. He told her it was not set in stone yet, but in the next three months she needed to

"Put up or shut up." If she wanted her child back.

Luke and I both were impressed with his genuine concern and demeanor. The last judge we saw hardly made eye contact with anyone and often, didn't even respond to the questions/statements of the attorneys.

Thanks for your prayers today. I appreciate them more than you could ever know.

Court Today

I'm scheduling this to post about the time Luke and I will arrive at Family Court. We will, once more, be face to face with the birth parents.

We should be in court right now hopefully being the first case heard. The thing with court is that you show up at 9:30am and then just sit and wait for your case to be called. It might be first, or it might be the last one at 5:00pm. You just never know.

I don't expect anything to change with Baby D's case. Basically, it's just a review to show the judge how much the birth parents have (or have not) done. Please be praying for my anxious heart to be calm, for God's will to be done and for Luke and I to have the desires of God.

To read about the last time we were in court, click here.

Thanks so much. I'll update when I can and let you know how it went.

Hearings and Reminders

This morning we went to court for the Adjudication and Disposition Hearings for Baby D. Basically, as I understand it, an adjudication hearing is the court proceeding where the petition accusations (the document that the judge initially signed for Baby D to be removed from his parents) is reviewed and if the parents feel that the child was unjustly removed, then they can contest the petition. If that happens then the case goes to trial (no jury, just the judge). However, Baby D's parents did not contest. All of the allegations in the petition were confirmed so we quickly moved onto the disposition. The disposition is where the attorneys recommend what needs to happen for the parents to get their child back. Then, the judge takes those recommendations and either modifies, adds to or omits any he/she deems necessary. It was all quite interesting. If you'd like more info on foster care court proceedings, click here (it will open a word document).

Of course, Baby D's birth parents were there, so I had all of the nervousness and emotion that I normally have when I am around them. Luke was there too, so that helped immensely. Can I just brag on my husband a minute....(of course I can, it's my blog!)...he is so amazing. He took the entire morning off to go to court. Now, if you know my husband at all you know that taking off work is not something he does lightly. In the 5.5 yrs we've been married he has NEVER called in sick (except 1 time when I was sick and couldn't take care of the kids). The only other time he's taken off work is when we have guests in town or for holidays. So here he is, beside me through this whole process. I was so thankful. Then, as we were sitting the parking lot waiting to go into the courthouse, he reaches over and takes my hand and says the most sincere prayer. He prays for the condition of our hearts (I especially needed that) and for our sweet Baby D. My husband is such a godly man, and I am so, so, so blessed.

Okay, so we get into the court room and it really wasn't that bad. The hardest part was listening to each attorney recommend that Baby D be reunified with his birth parents. I knew that this would be the case, but hearing it out loud crushed my heart. My mind immediately went to that moment when I would have to return him. I envisioned putting him in the car seat. My fat, chubby, handsome 1+ yr old, being buckled in and then watching the social worker drive him away forever. It makes me cry just thinking about it. I know that if that is where God leads us, He will sustain us, but I just can't let my mind go there...not yet.

Basically, the birth parents have A LOT to do. They have a long road ahead of them. Selfishly, I'm glad that they have so many things to do, because that decreases the chances of him going back to them. Then God whispers in to me, Don't you want them to know me? Be a light. It's too hard to swallow.

The most intriguing part of all was that the birth parents never even asked us how he was. When they came into the court room, before it all started, birth mom walked over to me and just said, "Does he need anything?" I told her diapers, because what else would I say? I'm so glad that I didn't blurt something inappropriate out like, "He really needs a loving, stable home...why don't you work on that, huh?" Praise God my filter has become better developed these last few years.

They never asked about him. They didn't ask who was keeping him while we were there. They didn't ask anything. How is that possible? How is it possible for a mother to look at the woman caring for her child and she not ask a single question about his well being? I don't understand and maybe I never will. Afterward, Luke and I went to get some coffee and digest what we'd just experienced. We continued to be baffled by their behavior and Luke continued to remind me that Jesus loves them the same way He loves us. I need to be reminded this continually. I need to be reminded that I should show them Christ's love. I need to be reminded of why we started this process in the first place...so that we could show the love of Christ to everyone we came in contact with. Remind me Lord, remind me, but please do it gently.