1,200 miles, 13 kids and counting

We're still alive. Whew! It's been a busy, busy, blessed week.

Luke's healing nicely from his emergency appendectomy 3.5 weeks ago. On the heels of his surgery and all that was going on I packed us all up, loaded the u-haul and we got out of dodge.

We left late last Thursday night (the 28th) and drove through the night to Luke's Dad's house in Mississippi. Then we drove over to Arkansas to visit my family and see friends. Then we drove back to Mississippi again spent the night, then to Memphis to see more friends and Luke's Mom for a couple nights. Currently, I'm sitting in northern Tennessee. We've driven over 1,200 miles in the last 9 days.

Tomorrow is sure to hold some surprises as we look forward to a day jam packed with 13 children under the age of 8.

I'm not even kidding.

In this great big bloggy world Kate (and her Savvy little women & 1 little man) and I have forged a friendship that can only be bound through the common understanding of lots of kids and lots of chaos and lots of laughs. We met up with them this evening and immediately her 6 and our older 6 hit it off. Giggles and chatter and crumbs flowed freely from around the table.

Now, all 13 kids are snoozing away.

Tomorrow's going to be fun day. For sure.

We hit the road again Sunday and roll on home.

I'll have stories to tell, pictures to prove them and lots to share, I'm sure.

Remember that time....?

I have at least 5 half-written posts drafted, waiting to be completed, edited and published. Unfortunately, I doubt I'll get around to them anytime soon. Life has been (blessedly) crazy over the last week.

On Wednesday, Luke came home from work at 11am. I can now count on 3 fingers the number of times in our 9.5 years of marriage that Luke has come home from work sick. I figured it was a virus so I stayed far, far away and silently praised Jesus that our children were already at the once-a-month Parent's Day Out at church.

I went and had lunch with some girlfriends, then came back to bring Luke anti-nausea meds, ginger ale and sprite before heading to the airport to meet some friends who were arriving.

When I checked on my man I knew it was something more than a virus. He was nearly grey and looked horrible. He complained of lower right abdominal pain. I quickly told him to get dressed then promptly drove him to the Emergency Room. Two hours later he was in surgery getting an appendectomy.

Praise God for good, reliable medicine!

While I was taking Luke to the hospital, the babysitter called and told me our van wouldn't start. On Saturday I jumped the van and took it to get a new battery. All seemed well until earlier today when it stalled out in my parents' driveway and refused to crank again. Currently, it's being towed to a local mechanic.

Our dog has fleas, despite regular flea medicine, and she's now brought them into our house. Before our van decided to die I ran to the Vet's office and got some spray. Sometime in the next 24 hours I need to spray everything in our house that is carpeted or covered in fabric.

Oh, and our kids can't be in that room for 2 hours following.

Remember that time our van was broken and we couldn't really go anywhere?

And last, but certainly not least, is the fact that we're going on a 11 day trip to see family and friends. And we leave this weekend. And I need to pack. But I can't lay clothes out on the floor and organize until I spray for fleas. Then I need to pack and load up the van.

Remember that time our van was in the shop?

Luke cannot lift more than 10lbs for the next 6 weeks due to his incision.

Remember that time we were going on a trip for 11 days and I had lots of bags packed that were over 10lbs?

Finally, we had a HUGE Fundraiser Yard Sale on Friday and Saturday. Our generous and faithful friends donated TONS AND TONS of good yard sale items for us to sale and use the money toward our outgoing expenses with Africa Inland Mission.

Remember that time Luke has surgery 2 days before a major fundraiser and couldn't lift more than 10lbs?

It's been an interesting 10 days to say the least. But friends and family have literally JUMPED into action and helped us in every way imaginable.

Remember that time we raised over $2,400 from a YARD SALE? Who does that?

God does!

Remember that time God was always faithful?

Oh yeah, that's yesterday, today and tomorrow. Praise God for His faithfulness. Even in surgeries, flea infestations, packing and vacations. Life is crazy but God is good.

And I'm eating milk chocolate chips straight from the bag. Sometimes, y'all, it's about survival.

The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;

his mercies never come to an end;

they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

“The LORD is my portion,” says my soul,

“therefore I will hope in him.”

(Lamentations 3:22-24 ESV)

He perceives my thoughts from afar

Usually I blog in the evenings and schedule it to post the next day. But lately, I fall into the bed at night, exhausted from the day and pelvic pressure that seems to be unending. So in a effort to update my blog and have some free therapy, here I am blogging during nap time when I should be napping as well.

This week has been extremely tiring and it's only Tuesday. I have apparently lost my voice due to some mystery cold. Actually, I have a voice but it resembles that of a 98 year old who's been chain smoking since birth. I spoke with our realtor on Thursday and he alluded that it might be possible that we wouldn't close on our house on time. Therefore, we could push closing from March 3rd to the first week in April.

I was a little happy about that considering my due date is March 8th.

But, as of today it seems as if closing will be right on schedule (maybe a day or so late) and we will, in fact, be holding our breath hoping that Baby #6 doesn't come on the day we are moving all of our stuff.

Speaking of moving, we have found a place to rent. It's about 200 yards from our current home so that SHOULD make moving much, much easier. The biggest catch is that the house we are moving to is about 1/2 the size of the one we are currently living in. Which means that we need to find somewhere for 1/2 of our stuff to go.

And I'm NOT all about storing our crap for no apparent reason. So, we have a basement full of furniture and toys and books and children's clothing that needs to go somewhere. My biggest frustration is deciding what to keep, what to toss and what to just give away. I have two amazing friends that gave up their Mother's Morning Out time last week and came to my house and helped me pack up and sort through most of our basement. Can I just tell you how relieved I feel?

Yet, when I sit back and look at what the next 30 days of our life here is what I see...

> A new baby
> A new house
> Moving and sorting all our stuff
> Deciding what is worth keeping and what is not
> Finding the essential baby items once they've been moved to a new place
> Making large purchases
> Discerning between a good choice and the best choice
> Still finding time to spend alone with God
> Still managing my home and our children
> Still schooling Elizabeth

Oh and did I mention we are having a Baby somewhere in all of this?

And we filed our taxes and there was a problem so we had to send in a paper return which means we will probably get audited. AGAIN. JUST LIKE LAST YEAR.

I am praying for God to give me clarity to see what He wants me to learn through this process. And I am reminding myself that NONE of this is a surprise to Him. He knew this would all be on our plate at the same time. He knows when Baby is coming even though I have no clue.

A while back Angie challenged her readers to memorize Psalm 139. I made it about half way through. But, the half I vaguely memorized keeps flooding back into my mind.

"O Lord you have searched me and you know me.
You know when I sit and when I rise.
You perceive my thoughts from afar.
You discern my going out and my lying down;
you are familiar with all of my ways.
Before a word is on my tongue,
you know it completely Lord.
You hem me in, behind and before;
you have laid your hand upon me."

Psalm 139:1-5

He knows how well I function on little-to-no-sleep because He has searched me and knows me.

He knows that this will either make my marriage stronger or cause us to distance ourselves from each other because He knows when I sit and when I rise.

He perceives my thoughts from afar. (That part just baffles me.)

He knows. I don't. And, somehow I need to make up my mind that I'm okay with that and just let go of the things I have no control over and just trust Him.

I love that He brings opportunity for me to see that He knows me better than I know myself. Like yesterday, when Elizabeth is frantically searching for a specific sticker book and I see her, from afar, doing the pee pee dance.

I say to her, gently, "Elizabeth. Please go to the bathroom before you have an accident."

"But Mom!" she stammers, "I don't need to go!"

"Really? You sure look like you do," I reply softly, not wanting to hurt her tender feelings.

She turns and sprints to the bathroom, barely making it to the potty.

He knows me. When I sit and I rise He sees me. He perceives my thoughts, desires and needs from afar. He knows when I'm on the verge of having an accident and He gently urges me in the right direction before my tender heart gets broken and the waves of uncertainty cloud my mind.

He knew our life would be this chaotic. I just wish He'd told me sooner.

Our life is never boring. EVER. Even when it seems as though things are "normal" around here, it's chaotic and crazy and full of energy.

I'm pretty sure that our life is the antonym of boring. And, I'm pretty sure that we are the synonym of chaotic.

But over the next month our lives will prove to be more chaotic than ever.

And, through it all I continue to remind myself that NONE of this comes as a surprise to God. He knew how incredibly chaotic our lives would be at this time and He remains in control.

(And lately, I'm chanting the previous sentence to myself on an hourly - sometimes minute by minute - basis.)

Why is our life more chaotic than normal these days? Let me start with the basics that you probably already know.

I'm about 36 weeks pregnant with our 6th child. Our oldest child is a mere 5.5 years old. That in-and-of-itself is chaotic.

But wait, there's more.

My grandma, Maw, just had major heart surgery. Major, major heart surgery. God is proving, once more, to be merciful and is healing her body unlike anything we expected. Her recovery will last for the next 3 - 4 months and my Mom will be her primary care giver. How does this directly impact our family, aside from the fact that we love my Maw more than words? Well, my Mom usually helps us out several times a week with childcare and dinners and such. With her giving all her effort to care for my Maw, our life will become a little more chaotic.

But wait, there's more.

We found out that Luke's paternal grandfather passed away and arrangements will be made for his memorial/burial in the next week. Luke is planning on attending the funeral, which will be in another state. We are still working out details, but he will certainly be traveling over the course of 2 - 3 days, while his wife is on the verge of going into labor. That makes life chaotic.

But wait, there's more.

Perhaps the most chaotic thing is that we finally sold our house.

Oh, had you forgotten that it was still on the market? Well, it was. Let me catch you up to speed.

We've had a contingent offer on it since sometime around October. However, the folks who are buying our house had to sell their house first. It wasn't looking good and we had agreed that if they hadn't sold their house by December sometime (I don't remember the date) the contract would become voided.

Well, that day in December came and went and we re-negotiated so that our contract would expire if we didn't close by February 28th.

We didn't think it was looking promising. Actually, Luke and I hadn't even spoken about selling our house in several months. We were sorta on auto-pilot with the whole house thing, or so we thought.

Then, randomly (you know if you believe in coincidences) last Thursday, Luke and I laid in the bed and talked about how wonderful it would be if God would allow our house to sell before the baby came.

We talked about the debt we owe on our house and how much of burden we felt over it.

THE NEXT MORNING I got an email from our realtor. The buyers had an offer on their house. At 5:00pm I was on the phone with our Realtor hearing myself say that a closing date of March 3rd would be acceptable.

That's 5 days before this baby is due.

With my Maw still being in the thick of recovery and rehab.

And now we have to find a place to live.

And pack up all our crap treasures.

And all the things that come with moving.

Our life is getting incredibly chaotic. More chaotic than I ever thought possible.

But God knew. He knew the before the creation of the Earth that we'd be expecting a baby and moving and dealing with recovery of my Maw and the death of Luke's grandfather.

He knew. Even though we had no clue.

So we press forward, trusting that the Lord is completely in control. Trusting that even though it feels like the ground beneath our feet is spinning out of control. Truly, it isn't.

Truly God is in control. Truly, He knew that when we placed our house on the market back in August, with a new baby growing in my womb, that it would all accumulate around the same time that the baby would come.

He knows what will happen in the next 30 days and I do not. He knows whether or not I will go into labor while my husband is several states away (please Lord, NO!).

He knows how on His own green Earth we will pack, move, settle, have a baby, help as much as possible with my Maw, support Luke's Dad and family and still Homeschool, disciple and raise our children.

He knows. Even though we have no clue. And I am trying my best to rest in that knowledge.

Hands Full Overflowing

I have never denied that Luke and I have our "hands full." I may have not always wanted to admit it openly, but never have I denied it.

Still, I can't help but think...."Surely we are not the only ones, living in complete chaos, desperate to seek God's desires and yet wondering if we REALLY heard God right when He called us to this place."

After all, 6 kids ages five and under IS a little crazy. Not to mention we are trying to sell our house and homeschooling and fostering and ...well, you know, everything.

Then, today I found this blog (thanks Holly):

http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/

Now, before you click away and say..."Oh, ANOTHER blog" hear me out. This girl, this YOUNG girl, is 20 years old. She followed God's call to Uganda and is now mothering 13 children and supporting 400 more through her ministry. A ministry that God began and is consistently providing for.

Yes, Luke and I have our hands full. But as tears stream down my face after only reading 3 entries on her blog, I KNOW that having hands full of what God is given us is the ONLY place that I want to be. What if we ALL got so uncomfortable by following God's commands that everyone else thought we were crazy? What could we do for lost people then? And how would God fill up our hands so much that blessings overflow them to the point of no return.

I can't even imagine.

What's Goin' On And Some BIG News

You know, around these parts we seem to have a lot going on. Let me give you the run down, just in case you've missed something these last few weeks.

* We are eagerly anticipating the call from the clerk of court's office to say that Aaron, our first foster-child placement, is officially adopted. We had hoped it would be last week. We were told on Thursday that it would be Friday. But as of yet, we've not heard.

* Baby Girl's TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) hearing was last week and we were thrilled with the judge's decision. TPR was ruled for the birth mother. Now, we are back to waiting on paperwork to process and time to lapse and eagerly anticipating our second foster-child placement to become a legal adoption.

* Through God's revelation of us being able to live on less, our house is on the market. It's only shown once but the continual cleaning and picking up is a little taxing.

* We've officially begun homeschooling. Yesterday Elizabeth, Lucas, Ashlee and I started small doing some handwriting, reading and singing. It is going to be so much fun and I can't wait to see all that the three of them learn this year. I remember getting this same feeling when I used to teach public school and it is what made me love my job way back then. Now, I love my job even more.

* Finally, and perhaps the biggest news right now is that we are expecting Beaver baby #6! Yes, I'm serious. I am 12.5 weeks pregnant and we couldn't be more excited! Elizabeth is VERY excited about being a big sister again and Lucas and Ashlee go back and forth from wanting to hold the baby when it comes out of Mommy's tummy and claiming to be pregnant themselves.

Life for us seems to be ever changing. Sometimes I wonder if it will ever slow down! But, I know that slowing down could mean missing out on some of God's greatest blessings. And, if that is the case then I'm going to be content with a house full of chaos, a life full of grace and a heart overflowing with love.

Kindergarten, The Perfect Recipe

Today we venture into our first "official" day of Kindergarten. That's right peeps, I ACTUALLY planned out our ENTIRE week of school, in my planner, on Saturday, with notes and copies made.

In my opinion, it's a recipe for success. Unless you mix in 1 overly enthusiastic five year old, 2 rowdy, easily distracted three year olds, one walking, needy 14 month old and 1 ten month old crawler, who has figured out how to get into everything. Then it could be a recipe for disaster.

What's that? I forgot to tell you that Aaron is walking? Oooooooohhhh yeah. EVERYWHERE. He's pretty good at it too. Unless he wants to get somewhere fast, then he resorts back to his lighting-quick bear walk. He's been clocked at 10 mph. Okay, maybe not but it sure feels that way.

What's that again? I forgot to tell you that Baby Girl is finally crawling? She is. And she's oh-so-proud of herself. Usually after crawling for a short while, she sits up and gives me a huge grin, squishing her entire face together and showing her two, itty-bitty bottom teeth. Oh yeah, she cut two teeth also. Geesh, I've have been slack, huh?

So that's our day today, in a nutshell. With all my planning it's totally a recipe for success. Unless you mix in all the people I have to take care of, not to mention lunches I have to prepare and naps to be had, bottles to be fixed and diapers to be changed. Then, well, it may look more like chaos. But, it's my chaos and I love it.

The Great Blog Scare of 2009

So, I got all cocky and thought that I was an HTML guru. Turns out, I wasn't. Thanks to the delightful help of T E D over at the google help thingamabob (see, not so tech savvy am I?) The Great Blog Scare of 2009 is officially over (I pray).

Whew! I was seriously sick over it, which I'm sure says a lot about my obsession with my blog..but you know what...seriously people, Blogger is my BFF (you know, aside from actual people who breathe and all).

You may now resume your regularly scheduled lives. I will do the same shortly after I reinstall ALL of my right sidebar. Which reminds me of #2 from this post.

Oh, and T E D, thanks again. You are God's gift to the HTML blind, which would be me.

Chaos

I posted about this song here. However, I keep hearing it played on the radio, and then today a blog I follow had this video. I think I am needing to hear it over and over again for a reason.

It is how I'm feeling right now...lost in chaos, emotionally, physically, spiritually.

Whatever You're Doing

Since Thursday I have had an ongoing conversation with myself, in my head (and outload but only when I think no one is around). It goes something like this:

"You know taking Baby Girl is crazy?"

"Yes, I do, but I CAN love her. I already live in chaos, what's one more?"

"But you do know that you won't have ANY time for ANYTHING, right?"

"This is my mission field. We were called, we answered, this is part of His plan."

I could go on and on, but you get the idea. Basically, my brain goes back and forth from proclaiming me crazy to pure delight in my Lord for being allowed to serve Him in this capacity.

Tonight I was driving home and although I've heard this song a few times before, it hit home tonight. As I listened to the words, the tears began to flow. I particularly love the chorus when they talk about how it feels like chaos in side, but "somehow there's peace." I feel the chaos with the peace and I am humbled that God would choose us. I know it's heavenly.

Whatever You're Doing
by Sanctus Real
(If you'd like to listen to the song while you read the lyrics, right click here then left click on "Open Link In New Tab." Select "play" on the first song on the list.)

It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender

(Chorus)
Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is You want from me
I give everything I surrender...
To...

(Chorus)

Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This is something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly
Something Heavenly

It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out

I got the lyrics from this website.