Ordinary

I know that what I'm about to say is not really going to shock any of you. But I have something I want to tell you. Lean in real close, okay?

Ready?

I'm ordinary.

Yep. Just an ordinary girl, who loves the Lord, her husband and her half a dozen crazy kids.

Nothing special. Certainly NOT a "Super-Mom" and definitely NOT a Saint. Despite what people say, I don't have a more-direct-than-you line to God. In fact, there are still days that I don't even open my Bible. Thankfully, those days are becoming fewer and fewer, but they still exist.

I'm not perfect, I think bad thoughts, I say bad things, I DO bad things. Sometimes, when the phone rings, I look at who's calling, roll my eyes then hit "Silent."

I know. Terrible isn't it?

I'm normal. Just because we adopted kids doesn't make us "Mega-Parents." Just because we desire to be Missionaries doesn't mean we are perfect. And while I do believe that we are to be held to a higher standard because of our roles within in the church and our desires to lead people to the feet of Christ, we are still sinners desperate for the grace and forgiveness that the Lord has to offer.

Wanna know what else? I'm scared.

Truth is, I'm a little worried I'm going to have a panic attack on Thursday morning. Just thinking about kissing my man and my kids good-bye for 11 days makes my heart pound, my eyes well up with tears and my breathing become more rapid.

I'm afraid. The enemy takes advantage of my fears and whispers lies to me,

"What will happen to them if you never come home?"

"No good mother would leave her kids and go half way around the world."

"What if they get sick or hurt and you're not here?"

"What if something serious happens and you never even know about it?"

"If you die, will they ever even remember you?"

Just typing those things out has made me short of breath. Truthfully though, I have two choices.

1) I can allow that fear to grip me, paralyze me both spiritually and physically and ruin my preparations over the next two days. I can cave to the attacks of the enemy, who knows how to prey on me in the most vulnerable areas of my life, and melt into a puddle of tears and fear.

OR

2) I can believe that God is sovereign and no matter what happens over the next 2 weeks, HE IS IN CONTROL.

I'm choosing Option #2. And I'm reminding myself of Option #2 moment by moment.

And I'm clinging to Psalm 56:3-4

When I am afraid,
I put my trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.
What can flesh do to me?

And also Romans 8:31

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

I believe that Christ is worth it. Worth everything that I have. Christ is worth leaving my husband and children for 11 days and traveling to a country with no power grid. A country that runs solely on generators. A country that is listed as one of the poorest in the world. This trip aligns with Scripture, so I know that God is for these things. I believe that He is worth everything that I have.

I believe Acts 1:8 was written for me, and for YOU. I believe that Guinea-Bissau is the ends of the Earth. I believe that God is preparing the hearts of the Badyara people in Canquelifa, Guinea-Bissau to hear about the Best Thing that's ever happened on this Earth.

I believe that the Lord will have His hand on my family and whatever happens, it is FOR HIS GLORY. I believe that I will step onto a plane on Thursday not fully understanding what He intends to show me. I believe that I will return as a changed woman. How could I walk with God and remain the same?

I'm a small town, southern girl who lives in an ordinary house and lives an ordinary life. I'm not any more special than anyone else. Just an ordinary girl serving an amazing, anything-but-ordinary-God.

And I'm asking for your simple, heartfelt, BOLD and BIG prayers. Will you pray that my ordinary self (and the other ordinary people I'm traveling with) will be used in a way that will baffle the people around us?

Here's the basic outline of where our team will be and when. You can click over my sweet friend Wendi's blog for an outline of how to pray for our team.

Here's the outline of our schedule:

Depart April 7, 2011: (I'm leaving out specifics on our departure and return times and layovers, because y'all, the internet creeps me out.) Just know we leave about Noonish.

April 9th, 2011: After a whole DAY of a layover in a our connecting city, we arrive in Guinea-Bissau verrrry early in the morning Guinea-Bissau time. Load up all our luggage and supplies and drive for THREE HOURS on a bumpy, horrible road in a vehicle that's probably not suited for 6 people and their luggage. I'd love for you to pray that NONE of us get carsick.

We spend a full day on April 9th with some Missionaries who live in Eastern GB.

April 10, 2011: Travel to the village of Canquelifa, Guinea-Bissau (Again, another hot, cramped, lengthy, bumpy car ride.) Click here to see the best detailed map I could find of GB. Canquelifa is up there in the top, right hand corner of the country. I have a feeling that the village of Canquelifa is going to give this country girl a whole new perspective of "living in the sticks."

April 11 - 15, 2011: Team will begin door-to-door (or hut-to-hut) evangelism in the mornings. Most of the people of GB are animistic or believe in folk Islam. Please pray specifically that the Lord would soften the hearts of the people so that they can hear that what we are saying is TRUTH. In the evenings, we will show a series of films in an effort to disciple the few believers that are in the village. Please pray for the team members as we attempt to disciple believers through an interpreter.

April 16, 2011 - Another hot, bumpy, lengthy car ride (over 5 hours worth total).

April 17 - 18, 2011 - Travel home, arriving in the evening on the 18th.

Thank you for praying for myself, Wendi, another stay-at-home mom named "L" and two gentlemen ("I" and "V") who are seasoned travelers to Guinea-Bissau.

And thank you for praying for our families as they live life here at home. You guys are awesome.

I can't wait to tell you all about what God has done and continues to do in Guinea-Bissau! Talk at you in a couple weeks.