I originally posted this last year on our anniversary but I thought it was good enough to post again this year. Plus, I still feel the exact same way.
And since we are officially having our Anniversary Date Night tonight, I figured this was as good time as any.
-------
It is a big church. The most grandiose in stature in the entirety of our small town. The dramatic roof lines and towering steeple sit perfectly atop rock and brick walls adorned with stained glass windows, all situated on the precisely manicured lawn.
It's a beautiful church. And every time I drive by I think about what happened inside.
I stand behind two huge wooden doors, stained to a perfect deep brown, waiting to walk down a burgundy-carpeted aisle. So much awaits me on the other side of those doors. Love. Commitment. Beauty.
The wedding coordinator adjusts my veil and the train of my dress.
Deep breath.
The organ begins to play the non-traditional melody of an Scottish tune, reminiscent of our college Alma Mater. The doors swing open, everyone stands up.
I blink.
It's 8 years later. And here I sit, mother to 6, wife to a man who loves me in spite of who I am. A husband who loves wholly, sacrificially and beyond my understanding.
In our counseling session at Candidate Week we reviewed the many statistics associated with our personality inventories, marriage surveys and some other psychological profiles that we sent in ahead of us.
"You have an over-idealized view of your marriage," the gray haired counselor told me, over the rim of her glasses.
I sat back in my chair, turning her words over in my mind, trying not to be defensive.
Really? Because I'm pretty much a realist in every other area of my life.
At the end of the session, she agreed, my marriage is not over-idealized in my very matter-of-fact head. Rather, I understand that I am blessed. Beyond what I deserve.
Blessed with a man who guards the purity of our marriage so fervently that he refuses to be alone with other women, even in the context of work, where such a conscience is often considered ridiculous.
Blessed with a leader who fears the Lord and seeks, with his whole being, to serve him, even if it makes our family uncomfortable and unconventional.
Blessed with a confidant, someone I can pour my soul out to, the nasty, dirty, raw and often ugly parts and he draws me close and prays over me.
Blessed with a protector, a guardian of our home and our children and someone who takes that role so seriously, he is willing to risk it all for the glory of the Lord.
I smell the familiar smell of the church and take in the pews, full of people. I look to the opening in front of me and see him, standing at the end of a flower strewn aisle. He smiles at me. My heart flutters in my chest. I reach the altar unsure of how I'm standing there since it seems as though my feet hardly moved.
We exchange vows and rings and we both cry. I wipe his tears. More sniffles echo through the rafters of the magnificent sanctuary.
We turn and face our family and friends. We are Mr. & Mrs.
We celebrate. It's glorious. Even 8 years later. It's glorious.
It's no fairy tale and my days are certainly mixed with their fair share of meltdowns and tears. And some days the kids cry too. :)
But we've come through so much. We've endured hardships and know that more are coming. We laugh together often. We love much. He still dates me. He still stops, through the bustle of our home, to wrap his arms around me and let me bury my face in his chest.
We argue, annoy the crap out of each other and forget things that are important to the each other. But we chose love above all else. We chose to bind our hearts together with God as the glue.
We walk out the front doors of the church, and the cold air hits us like needles. We climb inside the magnificent limousine and the driver shuts the door. I look at my husband.
It's over. Man, that went fast, I think to myself.
I adjust my dress. He grabs my hand. We kiss.
The driver starts the engine.
And then, the journey begins.
Showing posts with label anniversary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anniversary. Show all posts
Friday, December 30, 2011
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Mr & Mrs
It is a big church. The most grandiose in stature in the entirety of our small town. The dramatic roof lines and towering steeple sit perfectly atop rock and brick walls adorned with stained glass windows, all situated on the precisely manicured lawn.
It's a beautiful church. And every time I drive by I think about what happened inside.
I stand behind two huge wooden doors, stained to a perfect deep brown, waiting to walk down a burgundy-carpeted aisle. So much awaits me on the other side of those doors. Love. Commitment. Beauty.
The wedding coordinator adjusts my veil and the train of my dress.
Deep breath.
The organ begins to play the non-traditional melody of an Scottish tune, reminiscent of our college Alma Mater. The doors swing open, everyone stands up.
I blink.
It's 8 years later. And here I sit, mother to 6, wife to a man who loves me in spite of who I am. A husband who loves wholly, sacrificially and beyond my understanding.
In our counseling session at Candidate Week we reviewed the many statistics associated with our personality inventories, marriage surveys and some other psychological profiles that we sent in ahead of us.
"You have an over-idealized view of your marriage," the gray haired counselor told me, over the rim of her glasses.
I sat back in my chair, turning her words over in my mind, trying not to be defensive.
Really? Because I'm pretty much a realist in every other area of my life.
At the end of the session, she agreed, my marriage is not over-idealized in my very matter-of-fact head. Rather, I understand that I am blessed. Beyond what I deserve.
Blessed with a man who guards the purity of our marriage so fervently that he refuses to be alone with other women, even in the context of work, where such a conscience is often considered ridiculous.
Blessed with a leader who fears the Lord and seeks, with his whole being, to serve him, even if it makes our family uncomfortable and unconventional.
Blessed with a confidant, someone I can pour my soul out to, the nasty, dirty, raw and often ugly parts and he draws me close and prays over me.
Blessed with a protector, a guardian of our home and our children and someone who takes that role so seriously, he is willing to risk it all for the glory of the Lord.
I smell the familiar smell of the church and take in the pews, full of people. I look to the opening in front of me and see him, standing at the end of a flower strewn aisle. He smiles at me. My heart flutters in my chest. I reach the altar unsure of how I'm standing there since it seems as though my feet hardly moved.
We exchange vows and rings and we both cry. I wipe his tears. More sniffles echo through the rafters of the magnificent sanctuary.
We turn and face our family and friends. We are Mr. & Mrs.
We celebrate. It's glorious. Even 8 years later. It's glorious.
It's no fairy tale and my days are certainly mixed with their fair share of meltdowns and tears. And some days the kids cry too. :)
But we've come through so much. We've endured hardships and know that more are coming. We laugh together often. We love much. He still dates me. He still stops, through the bustle of our home, to wrap his arms around me and let me bury my face in his chest.
We argue, annoy the crap out of each other and forget things that are important to the each other. But we chose love above all else. We chose to bind our hearts together with God as the glue.
We walk out the front doors of the church, and the cold air hits us like needles. We climb inside the magnificent limousine and the driver shuts the door. I look at my husband.
It's over. Man, that went fast, I think to myself.
I adjust my dress. He grabs my hand. We kiss.
The driver starts the engine.
And then, the journey begins.
It's a beautiful church. And every time I drive by I think about what happened inside.
I stand behind two huge wooden doors, stained to a perfect deep brown, waiting to walk down a burgundy-carpeted aisle. So much awaits me on the other side of those doors. Love. Commitment. Beauty.
The wedding coordinator adjusts my veil and the train of my dress.
Deep breath.
The organ begins to play the non-traditional melody of an Scottish tune, reminiscent of our college Alma Mater. The doors swing open, everyone stands up.
I blink.
It's 8 years later. And here I sit, mother to 6, wife to a man who loves me in spite of who I am. A husband who loves wholly, sacrificially and beyond my understanding.
In our counseling session at Candidate Week we reviewed the many statistics associated with our personality inventories, marriage surveys and some other psychological profiles that we sent in ahead of us.
"You have an over-idealized view of your marriage," the gray haired counselor told me, over the rim of her glasses.
I sat back in my chair, turning her words over in my mind, trying not to be defensive.
Really? Because I'm pretty much a realist in every other area of my life.
At the end of the session, she agreed, my marriage is not over-idealized in my very matter-of-fact head. Rather, I understand that I am blessed. Beyond what I deserve.
Blessed with a man who guards the purity of our marriage so fervently that he refuses to be alone with other women, even in the context of work, where such a conscience is often considered ridiculous.
Blessed with a leader who fears the Lord and seeks, with his whole being, to serve him, even if it makes our family uncomfortable and unconventional.
Blessed with a confidant, someone I can pour my soul out to, the nasty, dirty, raw and often ugly parts and he draws me close and prays over me.
Blessed with a protector, a guardian of our home and our children and someone who takes that role so seriously, he is willing to risk it all for the glory of the Lord.
I smell the familiar smell of the church and take in the pews, full of people. I look to the opening in front of me and see him, standing at the end of a flower strewn aisle. He smiles at me. My heart flutters in my chest. I reach the altar unsure of how I'm standing there since it seems as though my feet hardly moved.
We exchange vows and rings and we both cry. I wipe his tears. More sniffles echo through the rafters of the magnificent sanctuary.
We turn and face our family and friends. We are Mr. & Mrs.
We celebrate. It's glorious. Even 8 years later. It's glorious.
It's no fairy tale and my days are certainly mixed with their fair share of meltdowns and tears. And some days the kids cry too. :)
But we've come through so much. We've endured hardships and know that more are coming. We laugh together often. We love much. He still dates me. He still stops, through the bustle of our home, to wrap his arms around me and let me bury my face in his chest.
We argue, annoy the crap out of each other and forget things that are important to the each other. But we chose love above all else. We chose to bind our hearts together with God as the glue.
We walk out the front doors of the church, and the cold air hits us like needles. We climb inside the magnificent limousine and the driver shuts the door. I look at my husband.
It's over. Man, that went fast, I think to myself.
I adjust my dress. He grabs my hand. We kiss.
The driver starts the engine.
And then, the journey begins.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
He's good holy to me
Seven years ago today I was sipping tropical drinks, pool-side in Cancun preparing to welcome in 2003. I had a shiny new wedding band on my finger and my handsome, new husband by my side. We had just experienced a 3 day whirlwind wedding weekend. I felt on top of the world.
Could it seriously get any better?
Little did I know that it could and, because of God's grace, it would.
You see, if you've read our story, you know that at this newly-married point in my life, an intimate relationship with Christ was something that I did not possess. In fact, I felt confident that because Luke and I had made it through some pretty tough times on our own, we really didn't need anything or anyone else helping us out.
We rung in 2003 with smiles on our faces and hope for our future. I am so glad that God's plans for our marriage were so much better than our plans for our marriage. I'm so very, very glad.
Seven years later I think about the naive, young wife that stood in front of a crowded church and promised to love, honor and obey the man in front of her. And today, I am so blessed by the handsome, not-so-new husband I continue to be paired with. I've blogged much about Luke but what I would like to add here is above anything I have ever realized before. About 2 weeks ago, while were in in the midst of a vacation that proved to be incredibly stressful, I had never thought of my husband in this way. And since this revelation, I have yet to be able to see him as anything else.
It is often that people see me with all of our children and they ask, "Girl, how do you do it?" While I think that there are many answers to this question, my most common two responses are,
"God gives you what you need."
and
"I am blessed to be married to Luke. He's excessively good to me."
But now, I realize that I need to have a change in my reference of my husband. He is not excessively good to me. Rather, he is excessively HOLY to me. There is a huge difference and if you're still with me, I'd like to explain.
According to Ephesians 5 a wife is called to submit to her husband as the head of the home. In turn, a husband is commanded to "love your wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" and to "love your wife as your own body."
I think so often we (I) get so hung up on the submit part that I gloss over God's command for husbands. Can I just tell you that it is remarkably easy to submit to a man who is loving you as himself? As his own flesh?
It is. Let me show you by examples in action.
When Luke and I run out of contact solution and we are down to 1 final bottle, after he uses it in the morning he will move the contact solution across the bathroom so that it is beside my sink when I'm ready for it.
When I buy new flavored creamer for my coffee, Luke will remove the paper seal under the cap when he pours his own coffee in the morning. Luke doesn't used flavored coffee creamer. He does this just for me.
When we were driving into Memphis 2 weeks ago and I just knew that I was right in my directing him to take a "shorter" route through his hometown, he quietly obliged me and allowed us to take a one hour detour through the most interesting parts of town. All because he didn't want to argue with me after 15.5 hours in the car.
He turns the coffee pot back on before he leaves so that it won't automatically shut off on me and I'm left with cold coffee.
He allows me to be mean and nasty and rude to him and then offers to rub my back because he can see I've had a bad day.
He forgives quickly often before I ever even ask.
He's slow to anger and prays for me fervently.
There is so much more but I think you're getting the picture. He loves me like his own flesh. He gives of himself just as Christ gave of himself for his church.
He's more than good to me. He's HOLY to me.
Even though I don't deserve it. Even though I'm selfish. Even though I am rarely holy back.
And since I've realized just how holy my husband is toward me I see it everywhere, in all that he does. And I realize that in the last seven years I have blessed by a man who often goes unrecognized in the little things. I have been paired with a man who desires to love me despite my unworthiness of his love.
And, most importantly, I have realized that when people ask me, "How do you do it?" my new response will most surely have to be,
"I am blessed to be married to Luke. He's excessively HOLY to me."
Happy 7th Anniversary Luke! I love you beyond anything I am capable of understanding.
Could it seriously get any better?
Little did I know that it could and, because of God's grace, it would.
You see, if you've read our story, you know that at this newly-married point in my life, an intimate relationship with Christ was something that I did not possess. In fact, I felt confident that because Luke and I had made it through some pretty tough times on our own, we really didn't need anything or anyone else helping us out.
We rung in 2003 with smiles on our faces and hope for our future. I am so glad that God's plans for our marriage were so much better than our plans for our marriage. I'm so very, very glad.Seven years later I think about the naive, young wife that stood in front of a crowded church and promised to love, honor and obey the man in front of her. And today, I am so blessed by the handsome, not-so-new husband I continue to be paired with. I've blogged much about Luke but what I would like to add here is above anything I have ever realized before. About 2 weeks ago, while were in in the midst of a vacation that proved to be incredibly stressful, I had never thought of my husband in this way. And since this revelation, I have yet to be able to see him as anything else.
It is often that people see me with all of our children and they ask, "Girl, how do you do it?" While I think that there are many answers to this question, my most common two responses are,
"God gives you what you need."
and
"I am blessed to be married to Luke. He's excessively good to me."
But now, I realize that I need to have a change in my reference of my husband. He is not excessively good to me. Rather, he is excessively HOLY to me. There is a huge difference and if you're still with me, I'd like to explain.
According to Ephesians 5 a wife is called to submit to her husband as the head of the home. In turn, a husband is commanded to "love your wife, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" and to "love your wife as your own body."
I think so often we (I) get so hung up on the submit part that I gloss over God's command for husbands. Can I just tell you that it is remarkably easy to submit to a man who is loving you as himself? As his own flesh?
It is. Let me show you by examples in action.
When Luke and I run out of contact solution and we are down to 1 final bottle, after he uses it in the morning he will move the contact solution across the bathroom so that it is beside my sink when I'm ready for it.
When I buy new flavored creamer for my coffee, Luke will remove the paper seal under the cap when he pours his own coffee in the morning. Luke doesn't used flavored coffee creamer. He does this just for me.
When we were driving into Memphis 2 weeks ago and I just knew that I was right in my directing him to take a "shorter" route through his hometown, he quietly obliged me and allowed us to take a one hour detour through the most interesting parts of town. All because he didn't want to argue with me after 15.5 hours in the car.
He turns the coffee pot back on before he leaves so that it won't automatically shut off on me and I'm left with cold coffee.
He allows me to be mean and nasty and rude to him and then offers to rub my back because he can see I've had a bad day.
He forgives quickly often before I ever even ask.
He's slow to anger and prays for me fervently.
There is so much more but I think you're getting the picture. He loves me like his own flesh. He gives of himself just as Christ gave of himself for his church.
He's more than good to me. He's HOLY to me.
Even though I don't deserve it. Even though I'm selfish. Even though I am rarely holy back.
And since I've realized just how holy my husband is toward me I see it everywhere, in all that he does. And I realize that in the last seven years I have blessed by a man who often goes unrecognized in the little things. I have been paired with a man who desires to love me despite my unworthiness of his love.
And, most importantly, I have realized that when people ask me, "How do you do it?" my new response will most surely have to be,
"I am blessed to be married to Luke. He's excessively HOLY to me."
Happy 7th Anniversary Luke! I love you beyond anything I am capable of understanding.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
The Other Side
Six years ago, almost to this very hour, I stood behind 2 solid, wood doors. My heart was fluttering and my eyes misty. As I stood there, with my arm looped through my Dad's, I had no idea what awaited me on the other side. Although the physical journey on the other side of those doors was just a short walk down the aisle, the memories, relationships and love that have been formed from that day to this have exceeded my wildest expectations.
The doors flung open and there stood my love, dressed in a perfect tuxedo, surrounded by our family and friends. Funny thing now, but I barely remember the long anticipated journey down the aisle to become his wife. I can hardly remember any of the details that seemed so important on that day. Time and distance has separated us from many of the people we asked to join us in our wedding party.
I wonder now, how might our marriage be better, closer and more holy if I had focused all my energy on becoming a Godly wife rather than a blushing bride. And although God's mercy and grace has proven to be the key ingredient in our wonderful marriage, I can only mourn for the days that I was so wrapped up in this world that I could hardly see my Lord beckoning me to Him.
It's only been 6 years, which seems like such a short time compared to some marriages. However, in those 6 years God has so richly blessed us with 5 healthy, wonderful children. He has blessed us financially, with way more than we could ever need. He has blessed me with a husband who desires to serve Him. He has shown me that a Biblical marriage is worth working for and submission is a beautiful thing.
As I think back to myself, the me of 6 years ago standing behind 2 wooden doors, I am so humbled at the way God has changed my heart and my life. I praise the One who had used our messed up story and turned it into something for His glory. I praise Him because He changed me, and us, to make our marriage last and become something functional.
As I watch the doors fling open on the rest of our life and the years to come, I'm still a lot like that bride of 6 years ago. I can see the place I am suppose to walk, I see the goals and dreams and fears that lie ahead. However, this time I have my arm looped through the Father's, and a Godly man already at my side. I am so honored and blessed to have shared the last 6 years with this man. And as we take steps into an unknown future, I rest assured that God is directing our steps and leading our lives.
Happy Anniversary Honey! I love you so very, very much.
The doors flung open and there stood my love, dressed in a perfect tuxedo, surrounded by our family and friends. Funny thing now, but I barely remember the long anticipated journey down the aisle to become his wife. I can hardly remember any of the details that seemed so important on that day. Time and distance has separated us from many of the people we asked to join us in our wedding party.
I wonder now, how might our marriage be better, closer and more holy if I had focused all my energy on becoming a Godly wife rather than a blushing bride. And although God's mercy and grace has proven to be the key ingredient in our wonderful marriage, I can only mourn for the days that I was so wrapped up in this world that I could hardly see my Lord beckoning me to Him.
It's only been 6 years, which seems like such a short time compared to some marriages. However, in those 6 years God has so richly blessed us with 5 healthy, wonderful children. He has blessed us financially, with way more than we could ever need. He has blessed me with a husband who desires to serve Him. He has shown me that a Biblical marriage is worth working for and submission is a beautiful thing.
As I think back to myself, the me of 6 years ago standing behind 2 wooden doors, I am so humbled at the way God has changed my heart and my life. I praise the One who had used our messed up story and turned it into something for His glory. I praise Him because He changed me, and us, to make our marriage last and become something functional.
As I watch the doors fling open on the rest of our life and the years to come, I'm still a lot like that bride of 6 years ago. I can see the place I am suppose to walk, I see the goals and dreams and fears that lie ahead. However, this time I have my arm looped through the Father's, and a Godly man already at my side. I am so honored and blessed to have shared the last 6 years with this man. And as we take steps into an unknown future, I rest assured that God is directing our steps and leading our lives.
Happy Anniversary Honey! I love you so very, very much.
In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.
~Proverbs 16:9
~Proverbs 16:9
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